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Doc426
73 / male
Los Angeles, California, US
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Lexophile or Sexophile ?
Lexophile describes those that have a love for words, such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish", or "To write with a broken pencil is pointless." An annual competition is held by the New York Times to see who can create the best original Lexophilia .
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you can get repossessed.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the crossed-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
When chemists die, they barium.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
This girl today said she recognized me from the Vegetarians Club, but I'd swear I've never met herbivore
I know a guy who's addicted to drinking brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
* Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end.
* This year's NY Times winner.
Now, can you add some in comments to make this a SEXophile joke?
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| May 20, 2021, 03:26 |
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Iwant2kssuallovr
61 / female
Bendover, Florida, US
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Re: Lexophile or Sexophile ?
Sexophile
"I advised Mr. K, who was a well-built handsome young man to try to have intercourse with a prostitute to ease some of his sex pressures. He tried a prostitute, but with miserable success. As soon as the girl undressed and lay on the bed exposing her vagina, he broke out in a cold sweat md ran out of the bedroom in agonizing fright.
"When I asked Mr. K. what he did like sexually he replied, 'I experience an exciting erection whenever I see a man up to thirty years or so wearing especially tight pants which reveal the bulge of his testicles and outline of his penis. If the seat of the trousers are dirty and worn. I visualize the anus coming in contact with the cloth. I then imagine my erect penis tearing through the seat into the young man 's rectum, and much to my embarrassment I often experience a spurting ejaculation which soils my underwear.'
'If I do not ejaculate while watching a handsome young man with tight trousers, I go home and put on a pair of pants similar to the ones he was wearing. Then I will rub my buttocks on a chair or on the floor and this excitation will make me ejaculate while experiencing a delightful orgasm.'
'Afterwards I have a special thin cane in my closet which I use in the following manner. I strip off the pants exposing my naked buttocks, then watching in a full-length mirror I hit myself until my buttocks are covered with reddening welts. This generally produces another ejaculation'"
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| May 21, 2021, 19:12 |
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Lexophile or Sexophile ?
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