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40something
56 / female
In the Sun, Arizona, US
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Anal Sex
I haven't been here in a while but when this issue came up I automatically thought you guys could help. During regular sex we have a wonderful time and we have tried anal sex . It just seemed to hurt so much. I've tried to relax and we have used both silicone and water lubricant. The thing is, it feels great until it hurts. Can anyone help with ideas?
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| May 29, 2012, 22:54 |
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WINECOUPLE12
59 / couple
Portsmouth, Virginia, US
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Re: Anal Sex
Recommend you get a series of butt plugs in different sizes. Lube is also key...there are some that even desensitize your anus. That helps. If you think you might want anal sex , start with the plugs a few hours before...feels great and by the time you're ready, you will be able to accept him.
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| May 29, 2012, 22:57 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: Anal Sex
What she said. Plus, if you use some smaller dildos, it'll help you get use to the feeling. You can gradually increase the size.
Lube and being relaxed are both very important for this. The desensitizing lube is ok, but it can also make it so you get almost no feeling from it. So, use enough, but not too much. Some places offer a "lube shooter' which works similar to a syringe. Just put the shooter in a lube bottle, suck some lube into it. with this, your partner can not only lube your anus, but shoot some inside you for lubrication inside.  If he shoots some lube inside of you, another option is to use a small dildo and help spread the lube inside of you.
Hope that all makes sense.
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| May 30, 2012, 00:41 |
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onehornee
63 / male
69'sDevine, Michigan, US
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Re: Anal Sex
QUOTE (40something @ May 29, 2012, 22:54)I haven't been here in a while but when this issue came up I automatically thought you guys could help. During regular sex we have a wonderful time and we have tried anal sex . It just seemed to hurt so much. I've tried to relax and we have used both silicone and water lubricant. The thing is, it feels great until it hurts. Can anyone help with ideas?
This can really be great but many lovers have had issues relaxing,and taking your time entering along with pleanty of anal play helps too.most every lover I have had would experience pain if I would remove my tool past a certain point.I think the butt plugs would be a great starting point and maybe see if there is pain starting with a smaller diameter Dildo,and work your way up.you ever have him enter you then hold still letting your butt slowly accomodate him before you go at it?One thing about lube to rememeber,during anal I dont think there is such a thing as too much lube, always errr on the side of to much rather then too little..hope this helps I can only reflect from the mans side of this.
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| May 30, 2012, 03:34 |
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newbie1011
62 / female
The Shore, New Jersey, US
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Re: Anal Sex
I found the three basics to anal are Trust, Relaxation, Lube.
I find that if I have had a few orgasms before even trying anal I am much more relaxed. I have also found that starting with a lubed finger is better than plug, or other toys the first few times.Probably the most important thing is having trust in your partner. Knowing you can tell your partner to slow down, or even stop is key to being able to relax. Your partner should never pressure you to go faster than your are mentally or physically ready.
Onehornee also had a good suggestion. No mater what is going inside you, you should take your time and give your body time to stretch and adjust. It's so different from our vagina's.We don't expand as quickly and there is no natural lube for the most part.It took me a long time before I got to the point where I could say I was really enjoying it not just trying it or tolerating it.
One other little tip is, use a small vibrator even if its in your pussy at the time it will feel good when something in inserted in your anus. If using the vibrator in your anus keep in mind if it has a lot of power it will not only relax you but numb your anus to some extent. I hope this helps you.
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| June 1, 2012, 04:28 |
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40something
56 / female
In the Sun, Arizona, US
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Re: Anal Sex
Thank you everyone. I will look into some special lube and toys. Do you know if the desensitize lube would also affect him too?
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| June 2, 2012, 04:47 |
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onehornee
63 / male
69'sDevine, Michigan, US
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Re: Re: Anal Sex
QUOTE (40something @ June 2, 2012, 04:47)Thank you everyone. I will look into some special lube and toys. Do you know if the desensitize lube would also affect him too?
good chance it could, but that might make him last longer too.in my life I have found patience to help the most ,learning how to flex those muscles could help the pain alot too,More then once Ive had a lover that could grasp and relax herself while i was hard inside her, and it was great for both of us..
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| June 2, 2012, 12:09 |
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sexslave2
63 / male
Naugatuck, Connecticut, US
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Re: Anal Sex
I would be careful here. The pain is indicating that something is not right. Tearing in your anus can cause pain and infection. Sounds like you need to work up to anal sex . You should not feel pain and stay away from anything that desensitizes you. If you feel pain then stop. The pain could be indicating that you already have tearing.
Anal sex should be enjoyable without pain.
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| June 16, 2012, 06:06 |
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onehornee
63 / male
69'sDevine, Michigan, US
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Re: Anal Sex
Hey when moving things since my ex has left I found this publication I bought for her ,She was ver y interested in Anal,but never had tryed it,I had and like the feeling of entering a lady that way!Although I would never trade Anal for my true passions for the love nest,anyways,Found this book maybe it will help.
The Ultimate Guide to ANAL SEX for Women.
Author :Tristan Taormino ISBN:1-57344-028-0
Its an older book i bought in 1998 but was worth the 15.00 USD
,it took her and I step by step into Anal sex do's and donts..very worth while if you dont find these other things helping out I recommend buying this book...
this edition also has alot of other Anal related info While this was intended for Women I found it was invaluable for me to know how to behave better when inside .
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| August 4, 2012, 20:22 |
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User no longer registered.
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Re: Re: Anal Sex
QUOTE (sexslave2 @ June 16, 2012, 06:06)I would be careful here. The pain is indicating that something is not right. Tearing in your anus can cause pain and infection. Sounds like you need to work up to anal sex . You should not feel pain and stay away from anything that desensitizes you. If you feel pain then stop. The pain could be indicating that you already have tearing.
Anal sex should be enjoyable without pain.
Doctors use it.
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| August 5, 2012, 12:19 |
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digdaddy103
32 / male
goldsboro, North Carolina, US
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Re: Anal Sex
how would u like to try me
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| March 13, 2013, 04:36 |
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